Well. Chuff knows. I've spent a lot of money on pregnancy tests recently, I do know that much!
I just don't feel right at the moment and have very classic early signs of pregnancy - for me anyway. A bloated, heavy feeling in my tummy, feeling quite sick at times, my nostrils are crazily sensitive, my boobs are a bit sore (not good when I'm a tummy sleeper), funny stretching and cramping in my lower tummy and I am totally exhausted. Although I feel as though I have to ignore that last symptom because ever since we have had LL, I've been exhausted due to her being an horrendous sleeper!
I did an early response test the other night and there was a very faint line there. I've since tested again and might have seen another faint line.
I did a Clear Blue Digital a few days ago too and it starkly told me "Not pregnant". Feels so harsh, those words, made me quite grumpy if I'm honest.
Today, I feel just as bad and tired, even with a cheeky hour long sleep in bed after we came back from Ikea.
So of course, I thought, oh what the heck, I'll test again. First Response again. Nada. Another negative.
I really don't know what's going on. Maybe I had imagined things on the tests with lines - I am tired, did I mention that? - or maybe I'm just testing too early and my HCG levels aren't yet high enough.
With the impending house move and this "am I/aren't I?" hanging over me, I'm getting more and more wound up by the day. I'm trying not to think about it and just let nature take its cause.
But it's so difficult.
Thursday, 17 July 2014
Twin Lakes - perfect for toddlers
Slightly later than I'd hoped (thanks to stupid solicitors causing stress and anguish! I am never moving house again!)....
We travelled over to Melton Mowbray last week to Twin Lakes. It was our first time to a theme park with LL and so we were a little apprehensive. It cost £16 per adult and free if you're under 110cm tall (which LL is). The park is smack bang in the middle of the beautiful Leicestershire countryside so the views, even in the car park, were fabulous.
As soon as we got out of the car, we could hear the unmistakable noise of a theme park - the screams from those adventurous enough to get on the rides!
We made our way round, just ambling along, and taking it all in. There are lots of different zones and the rides are all themed to fit in with the zone.
The American zone was great for LL. There's a small lake with bumper boats, complete with a Statue of Liberty looking on. She went on with daddy and loved it. Next up was a pleasurable looking carousel, called Dune Buggies, so I strapped LL in the front and I sat in behind her and waved to daddy... who, looking back, looked rather smug... Then it started going round and I understood his expression. He'd got away with this ride! Blimey, it was horrid! Up and down, jerky bounces all the way around for far too long! Of course, being a mummy, you can't say that so I was full of "oooooooh" and "weeeeeee" and "Uuuuupppp" while LL was looking totally perplexed! When it stopped, she cried her little eyes out, poor thing. "Not like that mummy" came the obvious response....
Next, she went on the caterpillar roller coaster with daddy. She looked quite content going around and I got some nice pics. But the response "Poppy not like that, mummy". Oh dear.
Further around, we came to the Red Rooster Farm. This is definitely more LL's style (and mummy's). Plenty of animals for her to coo over and they all looked well and healthy. Her favourite by far was the black billy goat, closely followed by all the pet shop classics (Twin Lakes has a pet shop license so you can leave with a rabbit or guinea pig if you should so please!)
For lunch, we went into one of the barn buildings. We always take LL some food with us as she is notoriously a rubbish eater (perhaps a post on that some other time) so she was fine munching away. There was a lot of areas for picnics, both inside and out, so we didn't feel as though we were being bad for giving her her own food, while we tucked in to sweet chilli chicken wraps and fries.
I have never seen so many soft play areas than at Twin Lakes. Really fantastic, especially as you consider the amount of rubbish days (weather wise) we get here. There was also a plethora of indoor rides for her to choose from. There was also the staple grabber machines too. Toilet and changing facilities were both clean and presentable.
There's also a heap of outdoor park areas, many of which include swings, slides, climbing frames etc. All in good order and many of them, so even in high summer, I can't imagine you'd be waiting around for a turn. LL loves the park so most of the afternoon was spent on various parks.
Her favourite ride came just before we left - the ride on horses. She went round four times, both with myself and hubby, and was loving it. She cried when we said no more!
So, we definitely will go again. Hopefully, she'll be a bit more adventurous next time and enjoy more rides though!
We travelled over to Melton Mowbray last week to Twin Lakes. It was our first time to a theme park with LL and so we were a little apprehensive. It cost £16 per adult and free if you're under 110cm tall (which LL is). The park is smack bang in the middle of the beautiful Leicestershire countryside so the views, even in the car park, were fabulous.
As soon as we got out of the car, we could hear the unmistakable noise of a theme park - the screams from those adventurous enough to get on the rides!
We made our way round, just ambling along, and taking it all in. There are lots of different zones and the rides are all themed to fit in with the zone.
The American zone was great for LL. There's a small lake with bumper boats, complete with a Statue of Liberty looking on. She went on with daddy and loved it. Next up was a pleasurable looking carousel, called Dune Buggies, so I strapped LL in the front and I sat in behind her and waved to daddy... who, looking back, looked rather smug... Then it started going round and I understood his expression. He'd got away with this ride! Blimey, it was horrid! Up and down, jerky bounces all the way around for far too long! Of course, being a mummy, you can't say that so I was full of "oooooooh" and "weeeeeee" and "Uuuuupppp" while LL was looking totally perplexed! When it stopped, she cried her little eyes out, poor thing. "Not like that mummy" came the obvious response....
Next, she went on the caterpillar roller coaster with daddy. She looked quite content going around and I got some nice pics. But the response "Poppy not like that, mummy". Oh dear.
Further around, we came to the Red Rooster Farm. This is definitely more LL's style (and mummy's). Plenty of animals for her to coo over and they all looked well and healthy. Her favourite by far was the black billy goat, closely followed by all the pet shop classics (Twin Lakes has a pet shop license so you can leave with a rabbit or guinea pig if you should so please!)
For lunch, we went into one of the barn buildings. We always take LL some food with us as she is notoriously a rubbish eater (perhaps a post on that some other time) so she was fine munching away. There was a lot of areas for picnics, both inside and out, so we didn't feel as though we were being bad for giving her her own food, while we tucked in to sweet chilli chicken wraps and fries.
I have never seen so many soft play areas than at Twin Lakes. Really fantastic, especially as you consider the amount of rubbish days (weather wise) we get here. There was also a plethora of indoor rides for her to choose from. There was also the staple grabber machines too. Toilet and changing facilities were both clean and presentable.
There's also a heap of outdoor park areas, many of which include swings, slides, climbing frames etc. All in good order and many of them, so even in high summer, I can't imagine you'd be waiting around for a turn. LL loves the park so most of the afternoon was spent on various parks.
Her favourite ride came just before we left - the ride on horses. She went round four times, both with myself and hubby, and was loving it. She cried when we said no more!
So, we definitely will go again. Hopefully, she'll be a bit more adventurous next time and enjoy more rides though!
Tuesday, 8 July 2014
Theme park fun!
We've decided to take a break from the packing and boxing up tomorrow and head to a local theme park. We're blessed in this area and have several options. We've never been as parents before, though, and so it's a whole new ball game!
I've already scouted around looking at what rides LL may like - and daddy! It appears that all the places we are considering have farms or zoos attached as well, which I know we will all like. Who can resist a meerkat here or a goat there, after all?!
Our options are Twin Lakes or Drayton Manor. We have Cbeebies Land at Alton Towers close by too but we want to save that for a day out with my sister and her little boy.
So, it's a work day for me today, while husband and LL have a fun day together and then we will be reunited for a lovely family day tomorrow.
Can't wait! Reviews to follow!
I've already scouted around looking at what rides LL may like - and daddy! It appears that all the places we are considering have farms or zoos attached as well, which I know we will all like. Who can resist a meerkat here or a goat there, after all?!
Our options are Twin Lakes or Drayton Manor. We have Cbeebies Land at Alton Towers close by too but we want to save that for a day out with my sister and her little boy.
So, it's a work day for me today, while husband and LL have a fun day together and then we will be reunited for a lovely family day tomorrow.
Can't wait! Reviews to follow!
Wednesday, 2 July 2014
The Baby Bump Bomb
It's been nearly 18 weeks since I lost our baby.
Things have been tough here, I won't lie.
I'm so incredibly lucky to have a beautiful, healthy LL but that doesn't take away the hurt of not having the baby bump I should have had by now. I'd only have had a matter of weeks left to pop and meet the bump who I'd have blamed for heartburn and sickness for the last 30 weeks (I suffered dreadfully while carrying LL but she was so worth it).
Of course, I don't begrudge people happiness and their dream ending to their TTC journey and I'm happy for those who get their little bumps that turn into bundles of beautifulness (because of my anonymity, I can make up words here, normally I'm such a grammar and spelling freak!)
But it's not making easy viewing when I click or tap on to my Facebook or Instagram right now.
One of my old antenatal friends posted a picture on Facebook today announcing her pregnancy. Instead of the standard "here's what's inside my womb" photo, she's gone with a more cryptic image of her son standing up in her bed with an Eviction Notice for January 2015, due to a new inhabitant. I don't approve of the image (it's my hippy parenting!) but I'm pleased for them.
But that then gets me thinking about how I'd have broken the news..... oh, who am I fooling! Ha! As if I hadn't had that planned the second I saw that glorious second line appearing on my pregnancy test!!! (I shan't spoil the surprise, I'll post it here if and when it happens!)
And then there's the multitude of gorgeous baby pics from other friends - "three months old today" or "eight weeks and first smile" the proud mamas say.
Argh. So jealous.
In my previous pregnancy, I did post a regular pic of my bump growing and I did do the normal womb pic but now I've gone through the heartache of a miscarriage, I just know I won't be like that next time around. I would hate for my female friends who may be desperate to be pregnant or have suffered a miscarriage to see my wobbly bits getting wobblier and constant reminders of what they want so badly.
Things have been tough here, I won't lie.
I'm so incredibly lucky to have a beautiful, healthy LL but that doesn't take away the hurt of not having the baby bump I should have had by now. I'd only have had a matter of weeks left to pop and meet the bump who I'd have blamed for heartburn and sickness for the last 30 weeks (I suffered dreadfully while carrying LL but she was so worth it).
Of course, I don't begrudge people happiness and their dream ending to their TTC journey and I'm happy for those who get their little bumps that turn into bundles of beautifulness (because of my anonymity, I can make up words here, normally I'm such a grammar and spelling freak!)
But it's not making easy viewing when I click or tap on to my Facebook or Instagram right now.
One of my old antenatal friends posted a picture on Facebook today announcing her pregnancy. Instead of the standard "here's what's inside my womb" photo, she's gone with a more cryptic image of her son standing up in her bed with an Eviction Notice for January 2015, due to a new inhabitant. I don't approve of the image (it's my hippy parenting!) but I'm pleased for them.
But that then gets me thinking about how I'd have broken the news..... oh, who am I fooling! Ha! As if I hadn't had that planned the second I saw that glorious second line appearing on my pregnancy test!!! (I shan't spoil the surprise, I'll post it here if and when it happens!)
And then there's the multitude of gorgeous baby pics from other friends - "three months old today" or "eight weeks and first smile" the proud mamas say.
Argh. So jealous.
In my previous pregnancy, I did post a regular pic of my bump growing and I did do the normal womb pic but now I've gone through the heartache of a miscarriage, I just know I won't be like that next time around. I would hate for my female friends who may be desperate to be pregnant or have suffered a miscarriage to see my wobbly bits getting wobblier and constant reminders of what they want so badly.
New home... complete with death certificate
We are due to be moving house soon, hopefully this month if the solicitors do their job quickly (why is it they work at the rate of snails?!) The house we are buying needs an awful lot of work but it's got so much potential and we love the location - close to an excellent school for LL and maybe any other bubba who, God willing, will come along in the future.
We have received all the contracts and paperwork now so we are in a waiting game until exchange. We're keeping everything crossed for a swift move as our buyer is putting pressure on us and, of course, we just want to get moved in now!
Amongst the paperwork that came from our solicitors was all the normal stuff, like property rights and maps of where the sewage pipes are etc. What I wasn't expecting, however, was a copy of a death certificate to be popped in there!
I am a believer in ghosts and spirits - not sure if it's because I want to think that many of the souls I've lost in my life are still hanging around me or if I want to believe that psychics like Sally Morgan and Derek Acorah haven't been having me on for years ;) - so I was a bit freaked out when I saw the certificate, noting that poor James Finch had died at his house in 1981. New Years Eve as well, so incredibly cruel.
I'm imagining that he passed in his - soon to be our! - bedroom but of course I don't know this and I would never ask any of his family, who have kept on to the house through the generations since.
Let's just hope he was a gentle soul and will look out for us and protect us in his home.
We have received all the contracts and paperwork now so we are in a waiting game until exchange. We're keeping everything crossed for a swift move as our buyer is putting pressure on us and, of course, we just want to get moved in now!
Amongst the paperwork that came from our solicitors was all the normal stuff, like property rights and maps of where the sewage pipes are etc. What I wasn't expecting, however, was a copy of a death certificate to be popped in there!
I am a believer in ghosts and spirits - not sure if it's because I want to think that many of the souls I've lost in my life are still hanging around me or if I want to believe that psychics like Sally Morgan and Derek Acorah haven't been having me on for years ;) - so I was a bit freaked out when I saw the certificate, noting that poor James Finch had died at his house in 1981. New Years Eve as well, so incredibly cruel.
I'm imagining that he passed in his - soon to be our! - bedroom but of course I don't know this and I would never ask any of his family, who have kept on to the house through the generations since.
Let's just hope he was a gentle soul and will look out for us and protect us in his home.
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